HRTech Interview with Dr. Julie Donley, Executive Leadership Coach and Keynote Speaker

To start, could you please share a bit about your professional journey—how did your background in behavioral health and nursing lead you to focus on leadership coaching and emotional intelligence?
My journey into leadership coaching began in an unexpected place: a psychiatric hospital. I started working in behavioral health in 1993 as a psychiatric technician while working toward my nursing degree. Eventually I served as a Director of Nursing in behavioral healthcare. In that intense and emotionally charged environment, I learned how critical it was to lead with calm, clarity, and empathy—especially under pressure.

What struck me early on was how much leadership impacted the emotional climate of the workplace. A single interaction could either escalate stress or defuse it. And unfortunately, many leaders didn’t have the tools to manage their own emotions, let alone guide others through theirs. I saw how emotional intelligence wasn’t just a “nice to have”—it was a necessity for safety, productivity, and well-being.

Over time, I realized that my passion wasn’t just in caring for patients but in developing people—especially the people doing the caring and leading. I went on to earn an MBA focused on management and leadership, followed by a Doctorate in Organizational Leadership. Since then, I’ve been coaching leaders to develop the emotional intelligence, self-awareness, and communication skills needed to lead in a way that truly supports people—because at the end of the day, leadership is a people business.

Your new book, Leading at the Speed of People, introduces the CARE Leadership Model™. What inspired this framework, and how does it differ from traditional leadership approaches?
The CARE Leadership Model™ was born from decades of observing what truly moves people—not just in theory, but in practice. Working in behavioral health, I saw how people respond when they feel seen, heard, and respected—and how they shut down when they don’t. CARE stands for Communication, Appreciation, Respect, and Empathy. These are the core elements that build trust, reduce friction, and create environments where people can thrive.

Traditional leadership models often focus on authority, systems, or strategy—but they can miss the human element. They don’t always account for the emotional realities of the workplace: the miscommunications, assumptions, hurt feelings, or unresolved tension that can quietly erode performance and engagement. CARE brings us back to what matters most: how we relate to one another.

And the research supports this. In my doctoral dissertation on leadership and work environments, I found that appreciation, clear communication, leader support, and a sense of community or teamwork are all critical contributors to job satisfaction. In other words, when people feel valued and connected, they are not only happier—they perform better.

What makes this model different is its simplicity and its practicality. It’s not about being perfect or soft—it’s about being intentional. When leaders communicate clearly, show appreciation, extend respect, and lead with empathy, they create psychological safety. That’s what allows teams to perform at their best. This is what it means to lead at the speed of people.

You emphasize that stress in the workplace often stems from poor communication, emotional reactivity, and lack of boundaries—not just workloads. Can you walk us through how leaders can begin to recognize and address these deeper stress triggers?
Absolutely. While workload is often blamed for stress, the real friction usually lies in how people interact. It’s the passive-aggressive emails, the unclear expectations, the unspoken resentment, or the inability to say no that slowly wear people down. People who are stressed or who live in fear don’t perform well. They shrink, withdraw, and expend enormous amounts of energy just trying to survive. Leaders can help eliminate this fear at work and create an environment that enables people to thrive.

One of the biggest stress triggers I see is the lack of clear, realistic expectations. When people don’t know what’s expected—or when expectations constantly shift without communication—it creates anxiety, confusion, and burnout. And when expectations are unrealistic, it leads to a sense of failure and disengagement. According to Gallup polls, this is one of the top drivers of attrition—and it’s completely preventable.

The first step for leaders is awareness. Notice where tension lingers—missed deadlines, repeated misunderstandings, people checking out or lashing out. These are signs of deeper issues. Leaders need to ask: What conversations aren’t happening? Where are we avoiding discomfort instead of addressing it? And how am I contributing to the friction?

Once leaders see the patterns, they can shift from reacting to responding. That starts with modeling calm communication—slowing down, asking clarifying questions, and listening without defensiveness. Boundaries are also essential. Leaders often overextend themselves trying to be everything to everyone, which only adds to the stress. Learning to say no to things that are not aligned with priorities is one way to reduce overload. Delegating effectively is another—sharing the work while setting clear guidelines and deadlines.

Leaders shape the environment for how people communicate and behave toward one another. Promptly addressing conflict and performance concerns goes a long way in creating a work environment that supports people’s best work.

By addressing these emotional stressors head-on—with clarity, curiosity, and care—leaders create more resilient workplaces where people feel safe to be honest, ask for help, and bring their full selves to the table.

Burnout has become a growing concern, especially among managers and team leads. What are some practical ways leaders can protect their own energy while still showing up for their teams?
Burnout often happens when leaders forget that they set the standard—not just for productivity, but for well-being. Leaders who are constantly overwhelmed or reactive unintentionally create environments where stress becomes contagious. Protecting your energy isn’t selfish—it’s strategic. You can’t support others well if you’re running on empty.

Start by getting clear on how you want to be experienced. Do you want to be seen as calm? Grounded? Thoughtful? That clarity helps you make decisions about how you show up—what you say yes to, how you manage conflict, and how you structure your day.

Next, pay attention to the symptoms of burnout—irritability, cynicism, emotional exhaustion, or detachment. These aren’t just personal issues; they’re leadership signals. When you notice those signs in yourself, it’s time to reset. And when you notice them in others, check in. Ask questions. Show care and concern for others’ well-being. Burnout thrives in silence.

Leaders also need to think intentionally about the kind of culture they’re creating. If you want a culture that supports well-being, you must model that. Take breaks. Set boundaries. Encourage downtime and normalize conversations about mental health. When you care for yourself, you give others permission to do the same.

And finally, pause before reacting. Leaders often feel pressure to respond immediately, fix everything, or absorb the team’s stress. But it’s okay to slow down, take a breath, and respond with intention. That moment of pause can prevent emotional overload—for you and for your team.

In your work, how do you see Gen Z’s expectations around mental health, work-life balance, and leadership shaping the future workplace culture?
Gen Z is unapologetically rewriting the rules—and I see that as a good thing. This generation expects more than just a paycheck; they want purpose, inclusion, flexibility, and psychological safety. They’re not afraid to talk about mental health, set boundaries, or question outdated norms—and that’s reshaping workplace culture in powerful ways.

Where previous generations might have tolerated toxic environments or sacrificed personal well-being for job security, Gen Z is more likely to walk away from roles that don’t align with their values or support their health. I’ve spent my entire career trying to shift workplace culture—asking for change, modeling it, advocating for people-first leadership. For a long time, it felt like pushing against the tide. Now we have an entire generation demanding it—and that momentum is exactly what we’ve needed. It’s not entitlement; it’s long-overdue evolution.

At the same time, each generation brings something valuable to the table. Gen X and earlier generations, for example, have shown resilience, resourcefulness, and a strong work ethic—qualities born of decades of adapting to change, building careers, and persevering through challenges. Those lessons are just as relevant today. Gen Z can learn from that example, just as older generations can learn from Gen Z’s courage to prioritize well-being and values. We learn from what doesn’t work—and from those who’ve gone before us.

This shift is challenging leaders to evolve. It’s no longer enough to lead with authority—you have to lead with empathy. You have to care. You have to be clear, consistent, and emotionally intelligent. Gen Z expects transparency, regular feedback, and leaders who are human, not just hierarchical.

This is the opportunity: we all get better when we learn from one another. Gen Z is holding up a mirror, asking leaders to be more conscious and more human—and when combined with the wisdom of earlier generations, that’s a powerful recipe for creating healthier, more resilient workplaces for everyone.

Can you explain how leaders can create a more emotionally intelligent workplace without overstepping into areas that may feel too personal or vulnerable for some employees?
This is such an important question—and a common concern. Emotional intelligence in the workplace is about being aware of your own emotional state and managing yourself, as well as being mindful of the emotional state of others. It doesn’t mean prying or getting too personal. It means recognizing that every person shows up with a full inner world—stress, emotions, and experiences—and choosing to lead in a way that honors their humanity.

People don’t necessarily want to share their story or struggles at work—but they do want to be seen, heard, and valued as people, not just performers. That begins with small, intentional moments: asking how someone is doing and really listening; pausing long enough to show you care. Too often we ask without actually hearing the answer.

We can be trauma-informed in our encounters, which simply means approaching others with the understanding that everyone carries invisible baggage. Emotional intelligence asks us to stay curious instead of making assumptions, and to create space where people can be real without fear of judgment or consequence. Fear is one of the greatest sources of workplace friction—it drives disconnection, lowers engagement, and shuts down creativity.

Emotionally intelligent leaders model self-awareness, empathy, and clear communication. They don’t push people to be vulnerable—but they do create an environment where authenticity feels safe. That’s what the CARE Leadership Model™ is all about: communicating clearly, offering appreciation, treating people with respect, and leading with empathy.

This isn’t about being soft—it’s about removing the fear and friction that hold people back. And when you do that, you don’t just get better results—you create better experiences for people, which is what truly sustains performance.

Conflict is inevitable in any team. How can the CARE model help leaders resolve workplace tension in a healthier, more productive way?
Conflict isn’t the problem—how we handle it is. Most people avoid conflict because they associate it with discomfort, drama, or being “difficult.” But when handled well, conflict can actually lead to clarity, stronger relationships, and better outcomes.

The truth is that conflict is often a result of miscommunication, unclear expectations, different perspectives, or mistaken assumptions. It’s not always about bad behavior—it’s about missed understanding. The CARE Leadership Model™ helps leaders approach these moments with curiosity and compassion, rather than control or criticism.

It begins with Communication— naming the issue directly, without blame. Too often, leaders talk around a problem or let it fester. CARE encourages honest, respectful dialogue that seeks understanding over judgment. We can’t meet someone where they are—or guide them forward—if we’re not willing to listen and learn what they believe to be true. Once we understand their perspective, we’re better equipped to clarify misunderstandings, correct assumptions, or even accept responsibility for our own missteps. That willingness to own our part creates the conditions for real resolution.

Appreciation plays a surprising role in resolving conflict. When people feel seen and valued, they’re more likely to open up and engage. Appreciation builds the trust needed to have hard conversations and move toward resolution.

Respect asks us to honor the individual—not just their position or performance, but where they are in their understanding, experience, or emotional state. It’s about holding space without rushing to correct or criticize. Respect also sets healthy boundaries, so accountability doesn’t become aggression.

And Empathy is the thread that ties it all together. It invites us to slow down, get curious, and ask: What might this person be experiencing? That shift from frustration to inquiry diffuses tension and paves the way for connection.

Ultimately, the CARE Leadership Model™ helps leaders move from reactivity to responsibility. When you model that shift, you show your team how to face conflict with courage and care—which is how a strong culture is built.

Leadership starts with how you lead yourself—your thoughts, emotions, and reactions. When you manage you, your team can thrive.

From a personal strategy standpoint, what daily habits or practices do you rely on to lead with clarity, empathy, and resilience?
My leadership begins with self-leadership—so my daily habits are designed to support clarity, energy, and emotional presence. Structure and routines help me stay grounded.

I start most mornings with a workout and, more recently, a meditation practice. Both help me clear my head and anchor my energy. Then I take a few quiet moments over a light breakfast to reflect on what I need to accomplish and set an intention for how I want to show up. That check-in keeps me aligned, not just busy.

Before each meeting or coaching session, I pause and take a breath to center myself. It’s a small ritual, but it allows me to be fully present with the person in front of me. I also make a point to take a real lunch break and often walk my dog during the day—stepping away helps me reset and recharge.

When things feel heavy—whether I’ve been triggered, overwhelmed, or something emotional surfaces—I give myself an outlet. Sometimes that’s talking with my husband or calling a trusted friend, but most often it’s journaling. Writing helps me process my emotions, so I don’t carry them into my leadership or relationships.

And I try to practice what I teach: communication, appreciation, respect, and empathy. I listen deeply, I express gratitude, I approach challenges with curiosity rather than control. And when things don’t go as planned, I give myself grace and begin again.

That rhythm—of presence, reflection, and grace—is what allows me to lead with consistency and care. Because leading others well always starts with how I lead myself.

For readers who are just beginning their leadership journey—especially those feeling overwhelmed—what’s one piece of advice you’d offer to help them lead more effectively?
Start with yourself. Leadership isn’t a title—it’s how you show up, especially when things are hard. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you care. But caring too much without the tools to manage that pressure can leave you depleted and reactive.

The most powerful thing you can do is develop self-awareness. Notice how you respond under stress. Pay attention to what triggers you, how you communicate, and how you make others feel. You don’t have to be perfect—but you do have to be willing to grow.

In my book Leading at the Speed of People, I write that you are the self-study course on what it means to be human—and your life is the curriculum. Everything you experience is an opportunity to learn, grow, and lead yourself more effectively. That’s the foundation of leadership: learning to manage yourself so you can guide and support others.

And remember: you don’t have to do it alone. Leadership can be isolating, especially early on. Find a mentor, a coach, or a peer group that will support you, challenge you, and help you stay grounded in who you want to be.

You’re not just leading tasks—you’re leading people. And that always begins with how you lead yourself.

Start small. Take a few minutes at the end of each day to reflect. Ask yourself: How did I show up today? What did I do well? What would I do differently next time? It’s in those small moments of reflection that growth takes root.

Finally, what message do you hope readers will take away from Leading at the Speed of People, and what’s next for you in this mission to transform how we lead?
The message I hope readers take away is this: leadership is personal. It starts with how you lead yourself—your thoughts, your emotions, your reactions. When you can manage yourself with clarity and compassion, you create space for others to do the same. That’s what it means to lead at the speed of people.

We don’t need more leaders who lead through fear or control. We need leaders who are grounded, self-aware, and emotionally intelligent—leaders who create environments where people feel safe, respected, and valued. That’s the kind of culture where people do their best work and thrive.

Leading at the Speed of People is more than a book—it’s a mindset and a movement. I’ve created a comprehensive, self-paced leadership course by the same name to help leaders put these concepts into practice. It’s designed for people who are ready to shift from reaction to intention, from stress to influence, from conflict to connection.

What’s next for me? Continuing to coach leaders and write—I have a couple other books in the works. I will also continue to create tools that support this people-centered approach. My goal is simple: to help leaders reduce stress, improve relationships, and lead in a way that makes work—and life—better for everyone.

My hope is that we create a future where leadership is no longer about power or pressure, but about presence, empathy, and connection. A future where people feel seen, supported, and safe to thrive. And you know the saying, A rising tide lifts all boats.” That’s the kind of workplace culture I believe we all deserve—and the kind of leadership I’m committed to helping others build.

If you’re ready to lead with more empathy, clarity, and confidence, I invite you to explore the course, read the book, or connect with me at drjuliedonley.com. Let’s change how we lead—together.